Rainy days make it hard to be a non-believer
I don't believe in destiny. I like to think hardwork pays off. Maybe it does. Maybe i am just a control freak.
Destiny offers a certain level of comfort that you sometimes seek when you're down. It's particularly useful in matters of relationships. In finding a partner in life. In finding someone. We can always turn to destiny when a recent interesting acquaintance becomes bland, when something good turns sour. It wasn't meant to be, we say. It was meant to be that way. We kid ourselves.
It would be nice to be able to tell yourself on rainy days that destiny is working on your 'Love story'. That somewhere somehow pieces of an elaborate puzzle are falling into place. That you can sit back and enjoy a warm cup of hot chocolate while the tides of fate bring you closer to your soulmate. Not believing in destiny makes that impossible.
I am not bitter. I can accept what is and isnt so. I can manage life alone. I have good friends. I know their value. I am happy with them. I know how lucky i am. The blessings are pouring, when i open my eyes. But wouldn't it be great to find someone who complements you. Who challenges you and supports you. Who loves you. Love. I wonder what it's like when someone who's not family or a friend loves you. Is it any different?
Wouldn't it be great to find someone who's complete without you but would rather complicate their lives with your presence because, well, love. Is it real?
I dont have destiny's comforting whispers when i ask myself these. I'm alone in my head. No one to assure me someone will come along. Sure, that's what people will tell us. We want to believe. I want to believe. But we know there's possibility that's never gonna happen.
It's hard when you don't believe in destiny and you feel some sort connection with someone. Albeit a fake connection. You know that if you don't give it a shot no wheels of fate are turning to bring you back together. That sort of thing only happens in movies.
There's freedom in choices. You're free to decide and also free to mess up.
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